Can I get a cup of coffee?

Clearly, I am an enigma. Offer me a quality craftbrew beer and I can wax poetically about a host of subtle nuances that are completely undetectable — or unpalatable — to most consumers of beer. I can do the same (to lesser degrees) with scotch, sushi, tequila and chili rellenos.

But I have to scratch my head at boutique coffee shops. I really, really do.

Now don’t get me wrong. The swill served out of my office’s coffee machine is just that. And while I love me some donuts, the coffee they make for dunkin’ isn’t made for drinkin’, IMHO.

I’ve never been a big coffee drinker. Mom wasn’t. So I’m not. Hell, I drink Yerba maté most days, which puzzles the hell out of my co-workers. But from time to time I do enjoy a cup of coffee. And I’ve had some excellent coffee in a variety of flavors and permutations. Thanks to everyone who has helped me experience something new with the bean.

Now allow me to throw that all aside and tell you my dirty little secret: I like Circle K coffee.

[pause to let the retching sounds cease]

No. Seriously. Circle K dark roast is damned tasty. For one thing, it tastes like coffee. I get 20 ounces for just over a buck and can add just a splash of half and half. Hard to find cream these days, I guess. And yes, I think it tastes great!

Even more important: I can always get a cup of coffee at Circle K. Yes, there are times when a nice mocha is what I need. I’ve been known to get an iced toddy when the weather is warm. Which it often is in Phoenix. But at that same place that makes a great mocha and a refreshing toddy, it’s nigh impossible to get a cup coffee when I want a cup of coffee. You know, with coffee in it. Just coffee.

Go ahead and throw things virtually in the comments below. I’ll manage.